This Weekend's Fixtures & Man City v Everton (19/20/21 Aug).

[McNamara That Ghost...]

Saturday, 19th August 2017
Swansea v Manchester Utd, 12:30 http://i65.tinypic.com/aey1c9.jpg
Bournemouth v Watford, 15:00
Burnley v West Bromwich Albion, 15:00
Leicester City v Brighton & Hove Albion, 15:00
Liverpool v Crystal Palace, 15:00
Southampton v West Ham United, 15:00
Stoke City v Arsenal, 17:30 http://i44.tinypic.com/5bpl5u.png

Sunday, 20th August 2017
Huddersfield Town v Newcastle United, 13:30 http://i65.tinypic.com/aey1c9.jpg
Tottenham Hotspur v Chelsea, 16:00 http://i65.tinypic.com/aey1c9.jpg

Monday, 21st August 2017
Manchester City v Everton, 20:00 http://i65.tinypic.com/aey1c9.jpg

[McNamara That Ghost...]

Congrats to Man Utd.

Third season in a row a team with the name Manchester in it has won the league after the first game.

[Niall_Quinn]

Congrats to Man Utd.

Third season in a row a team with the name Manchester in it has won the league after the first game.

Matic winning Player of the Year is pretty impressive too, don't think anyone except Rooney has won it this early.

[McNamara That Ghost...]

Swansea: Fabianski; Naughton, Fernandez, Bartley, Mawson, Olsson; Mesa, Fer, Carrol; Ayew Tammy Abraham.

Manchester United: De Gea; Valencia, Bailly, Jones, Blind; Matic, Pogba, Mata; Rashford, Mkhitaryan, Lukaku.

Tammy. :lol:

[McNamara That Ghost...]

Matic winning Player of the Year is pretty impressive too, don't think anyone except Rooney has won it this early.

Wazza has won Young Player of the Year, also.

[Globalgunner]

On the basis of that colossal performance against a full strength Madrid wearing Hammers shirts last week. You have to give it to Utd. They have the best manager ever also, at least that`s what Phil Neville says.

[McNamara That Ghost...]

Lukaku pubs it wide.

Ayew went for the outrageous before that.

[McNamara That Ghost...]

Jones heads on to the bar, what a miss!

[Niall_Quinn]

Swansea: Fabianski; Naughton, Fernandez, Bartley, Mawson, Olsson; Mesa, Fer, Carrol; Ayew Tammy Abraham.

Manchester United: De Gea; Valencia, Bailly, Jones, Blind; Matic, Pogba, Mata; Rashford, Mkhitaryan, Lukaku.

Tammy. :lol:

Ayew Tammy Abraham Peters

[Niall_Quinn]

I wonder if Lumpkaka can deflect a goal in off his fat arse again, thus proving he's the deadliest lump since cancer.

[McNamara That Ghost...]

Pogba being a dirty scrote.

[Niall_Quinn]

How is that not a red for Pogba? Raise your hands a flick and opponent - red. Walk up and boot them when the ball has been gone for several weeks - yellow.

[McNamara That Ghost...]

Great turn from Rashford but nothing after it.

[McNamara That Ghost...]

Pogba has to be off!

[Niall_Quinn]

Crisp backpass from Rashford.

[McNamara That Ghost...]

Absolutely ridiculous, no second yellow.

[Niall_Quinn]

The Pogba Rule is, in many ways, more lenient than the Xhaka Rule.

Ref refusing to apply the rules. When has that ever happened?

[McNamara That Ghost...]

Rashford diving.

[Niall_Quinn]

Is that Smudger begging Pogba to be careful in case his favourite team loses a man?

[McNamara That Ghost...]

Rashford isn't a great striker tbf.

[Niall_Quinn]

Clear pen for Swansea. Utd "defending" with both arms around the opponent again. Ridiculous. Do it anywhere else on the pitch and it's an instant FK. Easy to be good defensively when you can "defend" like that.

[McNamara That Ghost...]

Good clearance from Bartley.

[Niall_Quinn]

Might not be a bad idea for Swansea to introduce a bit of defending to their game, instead of relying on Rashford all the time.

[Niall_Quinn]

That Bartley bloke is single-handedly keeping Utd in the game.

[Niall_Quinn]

These millionaire players are fucking pubbers. When is somebody going to mention they can't cross a ball, head a ball, beat a man (apart from Pogba who beats his opponents to a pulp)?

[McNamara That Ghost...]

Flappyhandski. :bow:

Memories. :cloud9:

[Niall_Quinn]

Ayew has the first touch of a quadriplegic.

[Niall_Quinn]

Pathetic by Flappy :haha:

[McNamara That Ghost...]

0-1 Bailly. :sick:

[McNamara That Ghost...]

That was a great save from Fabianski off Pogba's header. Flukey bastards, Bailly tap-in after that.

[Niall_Quinn]

Cunty McCunty the Cunt has scored for Cunt Utd.

[McNamara That Ghost...]

Lukaku was involved in that goal apparently. :unsure:

[Niall_Quinn]

Goal created by the cunt who should have been sent off. 1-0 to the ref.

[Niall_Quinn]

HT 0-1

Not much between the two pub teams but Utd's ref has edged them into a lead.

[Niall_Quinn]

Let's see if we get a whole half time show devoted to Pogba's non-red and plucky adorable Swansea who have been robbed.

Or are those grapes only served at Arsenal matches when we're winning?

[Niall_Quinn]

Lump's HT stats

Touches - 0
Attempts - 0
Assists - 0
Goals - 0
Imaginary involvement in goals - 1
Weight gain - half a stone

[Niall_Quinn]

All is well lads! Sky have quickly determined that Pogba's foul from behind was not a foul. Was obviously a foul at the time, was obviously a foul on slow motion replay, but just goes to show how reality can be deceiving.

Arsenal were fucking lucky against plucky Leicester though. Ozil was soooooo offside the week before we got that cheated goal.

[Niall_Quinn]

I thought Henry was hired to add his expert opinions? So why does he spend his whole time agreeing with dicks like creepy uncle Pardew?

[Niall_Quinn]

Swansea out for the second half. Utd's 14 just starting to emerge from the tunnel.

[Niall_Quinn]

Sky stats report Lump got 10 touches in the first half. Wild exaggeration surely, it was nowhere near 10. 70 mill :haha:

And the touches he did get reminded of of that Wamping Willow tree in Harry Potter, except Lump doesn't have as much finesse.

[McNamara That Ghost...]

I don't think Rashford really knows what he is doing.

[Niall_Quinn]

Jones with the Matrix style slo mo dive.

[McNamara That Ghost...]

Fer. :haha:

[Niall_Quinn]

Swansea need to change the positions of Ayew and Abraham if they want to be effective up top. Somewhere like China should do it.

[McNamara That Ghost...]

Abraham puts it over.

[Niall_Quinn]

Tammy with a free header at goal. Obviously, it goes nowhere near the goal. He probably needs to be paid more to get shit on target.

[McNamara That Ghost...]

Tammy is from Chelsea?

[Niall_Quinn]

Mikaturdpan sets his sights on goal, shoots, half a mile wide. Grim. How can he not even hit the target when he's under no pressure?

[McNamara That Ghost...]

Kevin Oghenetega Tamaraebi Bakumo-Abraham, apparently.

[Niall_Quinn]

Tammy is from Chelsea?

Well he's either a chav loanee or a gypo. There's nothing else.

[Niall_Quinn]

Kevin Oghenetega Tamaraebi Bakumo-Abraham, apparently.

Signed purely to charge more to the fans for his shirt. Can't see any other reason they'd want or need him.

[McNamara That Ghost...]

Blind sends it out of Wales.

Fer takes him out with a bit of a shocker, booked.

[Niall_Quinn]

Good grief. That Swansea front pair couldn't hit the side of the Boeing factory from 2 inches. They are total pubbers.

[Niall_Quinn]

Perfectly fair tackle by Fer but the ref books him.

[McNamara That Ghost...]

Pogba freekick, wide it goes.

Decent technique though says Smudger.

Rashford and Mata hauled off, Fellaini and Martial on.

[Niall_Quinn]

LOO BRUSH :bow:

[Niall_Quinn]

Lump left on to see if he can get a touch.

[McNamara That Ghost...]

Lukaku. :haha:

[Niall_Quinn]

Jones for England?

[Niall_Quinn]

Sounds like Martial will be called Marshal this year. Very exotic stuff from the commentators.

[McNamara That Ghost...]

0-2 Lukaku. :sick:

[McNamara That Ghost...]

0-3 Pogba.

[Niall_Quinn]

Lump goal hanging again and he just about manages to hoof it in. Game over.

Great defending.

[Niall_Quinn]

Pogba scores from the dressing room.

Oh no wait - he never did get sent off , did he?

Fuck! A big blob of cum just shot out of the screen. I wish those cunty commentators would have a bit more decorum.

[McNamara That Ghost...]

0-4 Martial.

[Niall_Quinn]

Title in the bag for sure now.

Tammy off, which is his best position tbf. Too little too late.

[Niall_Quinn]

Marshaaaaaah makes it 4.

This has been a simply superb performance from Utd. Yes, it was utter shit from a bunch of pubbers for 80 minutes. But now Swansea have caved it means Utd are amazing.

[Niall_Quinn]

Question now - can Maureen keep this treble winning squad together?

[McNamara That Ghost...]

Liverpool: Mignolet, Gomez, Matip, Klavan, Robertson, Henderson, Milner, Wijnaldum, Mane, Firmino, Sturridge.

Crystal Palace: Hennessey, Fosu-Mensah, Dann, Tomkins, Ward, Milivojevic, Puncheon, Van Aanholt, Loftus-Cheek, Townsend, Benteke.

[Niall_Quinn]

Utd scum singing tributes to Maureen :sick:

[McNamara That Ghost...]

0-4 FT. Man Utd successfully defend their title.

[Niall_Quinn]

0-4 FT

We'll never know what the real score is, thanks to the ref.

[Niall_Quinn]

Accidentally shut down the Sky stream, which means I'll miss the studio wank session.

[Marc Overmars]

Despite their easy start, I do think they'll be close to the title. Sadly.

[GP]

Close, but just behind us.

[Niall_Quinn]

Despite their easy start, I do think they'll be close to the title. Sadly.

They've played two teams that have zero attacking threat (literally) and amateur defences. They've had no challenge whatsoever, so far, and have looked shite themselves. Lukaku in particular has been pure pony. It's good. They'll start to believe their own hype and they'll get routed by the first decent team they face.

[McNamara That Ghost...]

Liverpool 1-0 Palace, Mane.

Burnley 0-1 WBA, Robson-Kanu-Peters. Now he's sent off. :haha:

Leicester 2-0 Brighton, Okazaki and Maguire.

Southampton 2-2 'Ammers, Gabbiadini and Tadic pelanty. Arnautovic sent off and Hernandez with two. :popcorn:

[McNamara That Ghost...]

Bournemouth 0-2 Watford, Richarlison and Capoue.

What does Silva know about the Premier League?

Also, I think Bournemouth will go down this season.

[McNamara That Ghost...]

Pelanty to Southampton, I think. Thommo wasn't making much sense.

[McNamara That Ghost...]

Southampton 3-2 'Ammers, Austin.

Hart. :lol:

[McNamara That Ghost...]

Liverpool 1-0 Palace, FT.

[McNamara That Ghost...]

Burnley 0-1 WBA, FT.

[McNamara That Ghost...]

Southampton 3-2 'Ammers, FT.

[McNamara That Ghost...]

Leicester 2-0 Brighton, FT.

[McNamara That Ghost...]

Bournemouth 0-2 Watford, FT.

[AFC Leveller]

So man ure are champions elect after beating two relegation candidates. We beat Swansea 4-0 away from home and got 5 at west ham. No biggy.

[McNamara That Ghost...]

Huddersfield 1-0 Barcodes, Mooy.

[McNamara That Ghost...]

1-0 FT. :lol:

[Niall_Quinn]

Morata? 70mill? Was shit before, is still shit.

[McNamara That Ghost...]

Morata with a great clearance earlier.

Spuds: Lloris, Dier, Alderweireld, Vertonghen, Tripper, Wanyama, Dembele, Davies, Eriksen, Alli, Kane.

Chelse: Courtois, Rudiger, Luiz, Christiansen, Azpilicueta, Bakayoko, Kante, Alonso, Moses, Willian, Morata.

[Niall_Quinn]

Chav tactics have worked a treat. I switched off.

[McNamara That Ghost...]

Lloris. :haha:

[McNamara That Ghost...]

Dele Alli. :haha:

That's landing at WHL.

[McNamara That Ghost...]

David Luiz. :haha:

I've missed such quality.

[Shaqiri Is Boss]

So apparently they're playing the noise of drums over the speakers :unsure:

[McNamara That Ghost...]

Spuds 0-1 Chelsea, Alonso. What a freekick!

[McNamara That Ghost...]

Dier wipes out two at once.

Booked.

Rudiger was booked too.

[McNamara That Ghost...]

Kane smacks the post. :lol:

[McNamara That Ghost...]

Courtois saves off a deflected shot from Davies.

[McNamara That Ghost...]

Vertonghen booked.

[GP]

Spurs are a really dirty side. Not sure how they get away with it week after week.

[McNamara That Ghost...]

Dier hauled off, Son on.

[McNamara That Ghost...]

Morata pubbing it up.

Willian is a supreme athlete baller.

[McNamara That Ghost...]

Moses parts the crowd.

[McNamara That Ghost...]

Willian smacks the post!

[McNamara That Ghost...]

Kane shot blocked from Christensen.

[McNamara That Ghost...]

Willian and Morata hauled off, Pedro and Batshit on.

[McNamara That Ghost...]

Davies off, Sissoko on.

[McNamara That Ghost...]

Spuds 1-1 Chelsea, bullet header from Batman!

[Niall_Quinn]

That was deliberate.

[McNamara That Ghost...]

Eriksen and Delle Alli diving.

[McNamara That Ghost...]

Vertonghen airshot. :haha:

[McNamara That Ghost...]

Blatant scroting from some Spud on Kante before.

Spuds 1-2 Chelsea, Alonso again!!

:haha:

[GP]

lol

[Niall_Quinn]

1-2 Chavs - tough luck ref.

[GP]

LOLris

[McNamara That Ghost...]

Kane was booked for being a scrote.

[dostoy]

Lloris made 2 bad mistakes there, firstly the throw out and then he allowed the ball to go underneath him.

[McNamara That Ghost...]

Trippier off, Janssen on. :lol:

[Niall_Quinn]

Dele Alli will get over a million FKs this season, if the ref's continue like this. Just walk on the same pitch as him - FK.

[McNamara That Ghost...]

Spuds 1-2 Chelsea, FT!

Spurs at Wembley. :haha:

Shocking.

[Niall_Quinn]

Conte has had to "piece together" his billion quid team? Poor sausage.

FT 1-2. First of many home losses for the spuds hopefully.

Impressive by the chavs. Relegated last week. Champions this week.

[Globalgunner]

The predominant colour at Wembley is red. All the seats are red. What else did the spuds expect?. They should have made a deal with Fulham to share the cottage.
Spuds...trust them to make an Arsenal fan feel better about a shitty weekend

[McNamara That Ghost...]

Man City: Ederson, Walker, Kompany, Stones, Otamendi, Danilo, Fernandinho, De Bruyne, Silva, Aguero, Jesus.

Everton: Pickford, Keane, Jagielka, Williams, Holgate, Gueye, Schneiderlin, Baines, Davies, Rooney, Calvert-Lewin.

[McNamara That Ghost...]

Citeh 0-1 Everton, Wazza.

[McNamara That Ghost...]

Kyle Walker sent off. :haha:

[Shaqiri Is Boss]

Is that even a foul? :blink:

[GP]

lmao

[Niall_Quinn]

Sterling coming on :haha:

Gypos down to 9.

[McNamara That Ghost...]

Jesus hauled off, Sterling on.

Should've been Walker-Peters.

[McNamara That Ghost...]

Sterling. :haha:

[Niall_Quinn]

How disgusting is Otamendi? Pure scum.

[McNamara That Ghost...]

1-1 Sterling, fluked it.

[Shaqiri Is Boss]

Thank god.

Caught that nicely.

[McNamara That Ghost...]

Aguero. :haha:

[McNamara That Ghost...]

Schneiderlin sent off. :haha:

[Niall_Quinn]

Terrible by Aguero. You can see Guardiola has added his disgusting mark.

[McNamara That Ghost...]

1-1 FT. :lol:

[Niall_Quinn]

Fascinating program about Wayne Rooney on now, in place of the post match analysis.