Originally Posted by
Niall_Quinn
"What's to-day?" cried Arsene, calling downward to an agent in Sunday clothes, who perhaps had loitered in to look about him.
"Eh?" returned the agent, with all his might of wonder.
"What's to-day, my fine fellow?" said Arsene.
"To-day?" replied the agent. "Why, Transfer Deadline Day."
"It's Transfer Day!" said Arsene to himself. "I haven 't missed it. The FA have done it all in one night. They can do anything they like. Of course they can. Of course they can. Hallo, my fine fellow!"
"Hallo!" returned the agent
"Do you know the youth team, in the next street but one, at the corner?" Arsene inquired.
"I should hope I did," replied the agent.
"An intelligent agent!" said Arsene. "A remarkable agent! Do you know whether they've sold the prize Turkey that was hanging around there? Not the big prize Turkey; the little one?"
"What, the one as small as Santi?" returned the agent.
"What a delightful agent!" said Arsene. "It's a pleasure to talk to him. Yes, my buck!"
"He's hanging around there now," replied the agent.
"Is he?" said Arsene. "Go and buy him."
"Pubber!" exclaimed the agent.
"No, no," said Arsene, "I am in earnest. Go and buy him, and tell 'em to bring him here, that I may give them the direction where to take him. Come back with the man, and I'll give you a penny. Come back with him in less than five minutes, and I'll maybe give you two!"
"I'll send him to Jim White's!" whispered Arsene, rubbing his hands, and splitting with a laugh. "He sha'n't know who sends him. He's half the size of Aaron Lennon. Harry Redknapp never made such a joke as sending it to Jim's will be!"