Shit hair on a match day- Fine: send out on loan
Eating all the pies- Fine: send out on loan (first offence)
Eating all the pies- Fine: warm the bench (second offence)
Eating all the pies- Fine: don't renew contract (third offence)
Being shit: No fine as not your fault Wenger signed you (see ruling on "Squilachi")
Being a fan: Fine: repeated exposure to distain of the manager (see "we want Messi" etc)
Anymore you would add?