NOTE: The location of this post has been moved and the thread title (which was previously Wenger is Leaving) has been manipulated by a notorious pro-Wenger moderator. What was previously a message that contained no profanity and made a comment on a real life event has now been manipulated by a deliberately provocative title. An old and crude propaganda and censorship technique.
Coronavirus is finally hitting London. Imagine if that shit were to spread on the Underground.
Corona.
it will be bound to
look at how quickly it spread in a country the size of China: https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/health-51048366
the silver lining is that the NHS is recommending people re-adopt basic manners like covering their mouths when they cough etc...
Picture the scene.
You're a young man from Azerbaijan and you've recently moved to England for university.
You're in your first year, you're still adjusting to a new country, culture, language etc.
You're struggling a bit to make friends in this strange new place, but one thing you have in common with many of the locals is that you're a big football fan. You were lucky enough to be able to go to the Europa League final when it came to your home city.
Oh and look, and you've recently discovered that your college has a football team that trains once a week and is always looking for new players, perfect!
You decide to go along.
You don't know anyone, but you're eager to make a good impression, but you're understandably a bit nervous, so you're not playing your best. The ball keeps bouncing off you, your passes are going astray and you've made a few mistakes that lead to opposition goals.
It's also fucking freezing, and the wind is blowing hard enough to knock goals over. You're frustrated that you're possibly ruining your big opportunity and that the football here isn't like what you're used to back home where it's nice and warm.
It's getting towards the end of the session, and you're determined to make a good impression. After your below-par performance, it's going to take something spectacular; the chances of putting in a consistently good shift are gone.
You see one of your teammates make a mistake, and hand the ball an opposition player who passes it to a man in front of goal, who you're near to. This is it! This is your moment! If you can block this shot and save a certain goal, that's what you'll be remembered for, and the rest of your performance will be forgotten!
You go to block the shot. You're a few yards away and the striker is close to shooting, so you need to jump to get to the ball, but needs must. You leap through the air, foot first, determined to get a touch on the ball ball. This is going to be spectacular! You're gonna be a hero!
But alas, the striker gets to the ball before you. Quite a bit before you, in fact. So much so that he has time to plant his foot onto the ground in the exact spot where the ball was. The ball you've just launched yourself at with all your weight.
Crunch.
The striker goes down yelling in pain.
Fuck.
Not only have you just played below your usual standards, you've also injured one of the players whose team you wanted to join. This hasn't gone at all as planned.
To add injury to insult, you've also hurt yourself in the process, and as you see the man you injured being supported by his teammates, you're left to limp back to halls alone, dejected and miserable.
Anyway yeah I feel bad for the guy, but being on crutches for the next few weeks is gonna be annoying as fuck.
You used to be everything to me
Now you're tired of fighting
Have you had a stroke?
Well. At least the story involves a foreigner feeling sad and getting hurt.
Get some horse placenta on it.
Also, did you score?