Arsenal v Besiktas - Wed 27th Aug 19.45 KO - Sky Sports 5

[The Emirates Gallactico]

If we haven't banged in at least a couple by 60 mins I'll start bricking it.


Agree with playing Rosicky. He's usually very good in important games.

[I am invisible]

Rosicky gets my vote too.

[Munchies]

5-0 Arsenal

[Munchies]

Arsenal's home record in Champions League qualifiers:
Pld 6
W 6
D 0
L 0
F 15
A 2

Bye Bye Beşiktaş!

[Dein-machine]

Plan B boys:
Try to take the lead ( fuck knows who's going to score ) by getting our full backs forward like we did on Sat second half instead of shiting ourselves playing too deep as per the 1st half & any time we play a top 6 team, it normally results in far more options up top which leads to far more goal scoring opportunities ( I know, I'm a tactical genious!). However after taking the lead we adopt the "Wenger Shitypants" option & let them attack us. Near the end of the game let them cross from the left to our back post, Monreal with be roughed up by a nine stone Turkish dwarf & you wouldn't believe it but Ozil refuses to track back from left midfield & they get the equaliser. Play out the rest of the game to finish 1-1.
We are out of the C.L, the fans boo, the players look dissapointed & Wenger blames the ref - it all looks very normal, so UEFA don't investigate us for match fixing.
Now though is the good bit - we have qualified for the Europa Cup with Europe's other under achievers. This surely is the only thing we can compete in with our forward line. We scrape through the group stages having played teams from Uzbekistan, Greenland & the Faroe Islands. We reach the new year, Giroud is back from his broken ankle but his agent refuses to let him play until after the Paris Fashion show as his catwalk career is in danger if he gets anymore injuries. We are forced into the Jan transfer window, now desperate for a striker but there's no one decent available that isn't cup tied - Don't fret "Le Prof" is on the case & we find a Moroccan carpet seller who finished top scorer in the Moroccan 2nd div the previous year & guess what, he's a free transfer.
Very important that, we don't wait to break into the 60 mill plus in the bank otherwise we won't be able to buy another attacking midfielder for 40 mill next summer.
Its now May & we've got to the Europa Cup final against the Spuds - 2 mins to go & Sanogo injures himself stretching to control a ball he has just trapped - on comes the Moroccan & scores with a diving header in the final minute becoming the first guy to score a European winning goal wearing a fez. We've won another trophy, Letters is on GW hailing his master Wenger & talking about another "Springboard" to success that will now happen but ofcourse he's right - We have qualified for the Champions League next year. This is a double whammy because due to our shit strikeforce & shitty little Spanish DM we finish 8th, a point ahead of Stoke & West Ham. Chelsea finish 5 but win the Champions League by parking the bus in every game, drawing 0-0 but winning on pens every round (Terry doesnt take one). The Spuds finish 4th behind City, Liverpool & Champions Palace, inspired by 52 goals from Chamakh ( does anyone realise how good he would look in our frontline at the moment), - but the 5 C.L places then go to the top 3 plus us & the Chavs. We've fucked the Spuds again,even without winning our 4th place trophy ---- trust me, its the future

[Power n Glory]

I really don't care about qualifying. We have no chance of winning the CL and I find the whole process tedious. We go out today, spares us from going out in the knockout stages.

I just want to see a solid performance and the team finally ticking. Limping over the finish line won't cut it for me.

[Globalgunner]

Plan B boys:
Try to take the lead ( fuck knows who's going to score ) by getting our full backs forward like we did on Sat second half instead of shiting ourselves playing too deep as per the 1st half & any time we play a top 6 team, it normally results in far more options up top which leads to far more goal scoring opportunities ( I know, I'm a tactical genious!). However after taking the lead we adopt the "Wenger Shitypants" option & let them attack us. Near the end of the game let them cross from the left to our back post, Monreal with be roughed up by a nine stone Turkish dwarf & you wouldn't believe it but Ozil refuses to track back from left midfield & they get the equaliser. Play out the rest of the game to finish 1-1.
We are out of the C.L, the fans boo, the players look dissapointed & Wenger blames the ref - it all looks very normal, so UEFA don't investigate us for match fixing.
Now though is the good bit - we have qualified for the Europa Cup with Europe's other under achievers. This surely is the only thing we can compete in with our forward line. We scrape through the group stages having played teams from Uzbekistan, Greenland & the Faroe Islands. We reach the new year, Giroud is back from his broken ankle but his agent refuses to let him play until after the Paris Fashion show as his catwalk career is in danger if he gets anymore injuries. We are forced into the Jan transfer window, now desperate for a striker but there's no one decent available that isn't cup tied - Don't fret "Le Prof" is on the case & we find a Moroccan carpet seller who finished top scorer in the Moroccan 2nd div the previous year & guess what, he's a free transfer.
Very important that, we don't wait to break into the 60 mill plus in the bank otherwise we won't be able to buy another attacking midfielder for 40 mill next summer.
Its now May & we've got to the Europa Cup final against the Spuds - 2 mins to go & Sanogo injures himself stretching to control a ball he has just trapped - on comes the Moroccan & scores with a diving header in the final minute becoming the first guy to score a European winning goal wearing a fez. We've won another trophy, Letters is on GW hailing his master Wenger & talking about another "Springboard" to success that will now happen but ofcourse he's right - We have qualified for the Champions League next year. This is a double whammy because due to our shit strikeforce & shitty little Spanish DM we finish 8th, a point ahead of Stoke & West Ham. Chelsea finish 5 but win the Champions League by parking the bus in every game, drawing 0-0 but winning on pens every round (Terry doesnt take one). The Spuds finish 4th behind City, Liverpool & Champions Palace, inspired by 52 goals from Chamakh ( does anyone realise how good he would look in our frontline at the moment), - but the 5 C.L places then go to the top 3 plus us & the Chavs. We've fucked the Spuds again,even without winning our 4th place trophy ---- trust me, its the future

There`s a cure for what you`ve got. but i`m gonna need four strong chaps to hold you down in order to administer it,

[Marc Overmars]

Winning the Europa League and denying Spurs CL qualification sounds good to me tbf.

[Syn]

I really don't care about qualifying. We have no chance of winning the CL and I find the whole process tedious. We go out today, spares us from going out in the knockout stages.

I just want to see a solid performance and the team finally ticking. Limping over the finish line won't cut it for me.

With no CL football, we don't have Ozil, Alexis and probably would lose Ramsey next summer. We need it to progress as a club.

You'd miss it. Something else to look forward to after a shit Wednesday at work.

[Shaqiri Is Boss]

The Europa League is just a depressing tournament to be in, overall.

Never take the CL for granted.